The Phoenix Hyperbole

‘Linda’ says hello.

I also want to say hello, but, I honestly have no idea how to start. If you want to be literal about it, I guess I already have started so I kinda just have to run with whatever it is that’s pouring out of my head right now. Which are words. Words are pouring out of my head right now.

And I just remembered why I both love and hate writing. Moving on.

The one lesson I remember very well from my Feature Editorial class is my lecturer telling us how the first pieces of literature we will ever write are going to be complete and utter shit. One only has to go through my blog to understand that.

Also it doesn’t help that every single time I’ve sat in front of my screen to come up with something for my next post, the only thought that is ever so clear to me is ‘Fuck This‘.

So. It’s 2017. It’s Ramadhan, and somehow I’m back to writing after winning the award for ‘Procrastinator of the Millennium‘ back to back. A feat I’m sure no one has ever achieved in their life before and probably never will, because;

1. Unfortunately, you are not me
2. You will never be me
3. It’s pretty much impossible (don’t ask me how I did it)

I have literally taken 2 years (almost to the day if I just put my head down and let the weekend come) to write my fourth post. Fourth. 4. VI IV.

I feel like I’ve gone through a thousand and one changes. Both good and bad. Probably one or more mid-life crises which I came out of alive, despite the Greeks believing that going through a crisis basically meant that was it for you. Your life is over. Done.

“Kuf-dead” is what I heard someone say one time, somewhere, somewhen.

I feel like I’m getting to the end of my blabbering, which let’s be honest, is what this is. I guess at the end of it all, all I want to say is that I’m still here, still alive and kicking (Alhamdulillah), and I’m going to actually try and keep this up even if it’s just once a month. I mean how hard can it be? I’m not exactly losing anything if you think about it (probably my sanity, but that went out the window a long time ago).

So yeah, Some African Guy is back and better than ever. Which is to say more weird and strange than ever. But yeah. Fuck it. Let’s do this.

PS: I have a podcast now so if you want to actually hear my babbling rather than imagine it in your head then here you go. Enjoy.

Ramadan Kareem everyone.